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A Three-part Plan To Enjoy The Festive Season
By Lisa Martin, Mon Dec 26th
A few years ago I read a story that gave me a new perspective onthe holiday season. In this tale, a fictional town wasexperiencing the worst yuletide in its history because all thefemale residents were on strike. This reminded me that, often,women are the foundations, the unsung heroes, of the holidayseason.
For many us, the non-fictional holiday story goes like this:Every year, you promise to get a better grip on the holidays butsomehow, you always get caught up in the stress of the season.No wonder you get tense at this time of the year. You have a lotto do. In the midst of planning parties, meeting year-enddeadlines, making travel arrangements, attending schoolconcerts, baking cookies, buying presents and doing a multitudeof other tasks, you want to be composed, have fun and not gainweight.
Follow this stress-prevention plan to experience a festiverather than frazzled season.
1. Identify stress-relief tools It's easy to become so preoccupied with taking care of the dailyurgencies of the season -- the cooking, the visiting, and theorganizing -- that no space, time or energy is left for you.When your needs and self-care fall to the bottom of your list,this is a one-way ticket to a tired, cranky, impatient you. Thebest gift you can give your family and yourself this season is ahealthy, happy you. The secret to making this happen is to giveyourself permission to put the quality of your own life at thetop of your holiday wish list. To do so, identify three holidaystress-relief tools you can use to take better care of you, suchas taking a bath, practicing meditation, going out for a walk,reading your favorite book, renting a video, sleeping in orperforming breathing exercises. Write these ideas down and whenyou feel like you are reaching the edge of comfort, make apledge to engage in one or all three stress-relieving activities.
2. Ask for help Asking for help can be extremely difficult. But if you don'trequest assistance during the holidays you may find yourself atyour wit's end. If you think you need to do it all, think again.Acknowledge that support will ease your load and make thingshappen faster. Just becoming aware that you could use someassistance and getting comfortable asking for it can be thetoughest part. But once you get over your inhibitions of seekingsupport, you'll find that folks really want to help you in yourefforts to create a wonderful holiday season. Resist thetemptation to go it alone or take on more than you canreasonably do. Draft a list of activities you want to commit tothis season (nothing more) and write the names of the peopleyou'd like to help out. Then start making calls.
3. Eliminate holiday stressors You know what and who they are -- the physical and emotionalstressors that consume a lot of your holiday energy and space.This season, take a few minutes to think about the things thatmay be a source of stress and list them all. It will feel sogood to get these worries out of your head and down on paper.Once you've completed this "stressor inventory" make a consciouseffort to eliminate each one. If you know cooking a traditionaldinner for 25 is high on your list, don't commit to it thisyear. Either say no, ask another family member to host orprepare that seafood buffet you always wanted to experimentwith. It is in your control to say "yes" to the things thatfulfill you and make your holidays happy, and "no" to your"shoulds" and ''have tos."
A joy-filled festive season awaits us all. Choose what you wantyour personal experience to be. With the wisdom and power tocreate stress-free holidays, tap into what you really want andgive yourself permission to enjoy it. And if you are skepticalthat no matter what you do, you'll still feel stressed out thisseason, remember that you can always go on strike.
About the author:Lisa Martin, PCC, is the author of the acclaimed Briefcase Moms:10 Proven Practices to Balance Working Mothers' Lives. She liveswhat she writes and talks about. Mother of a six year-old son, acertified executive coach with 20 years of corporate andentrepreneurial experience, and the founder and president ofBriefcase Moms®, she is all too familiar with the tug-of-war andchallenges of work-life balance. http:www.briefcasemoms.com
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